Hello friends!

I know I have been MIA for a while now :( You can thank junior year for that. Junior year was hands down the toughest year of school I have ever had. Somehow, though, I survived, and managed to get straight As despite my crazy AP and honors classes! :) So in the end, even though I thought I might not make it a few times, I did and now I am free for 2 months!!!

I know I left you guys hanging in a big way with my Junior Dinner Dance so I will keep you in suspense no longer. JDD was a ton of fun! I went with a really great group of friends. One good thing that did come out of Junior year is that I found a group of friends this year that I love and feel really close too, which I have struggled to do in past years. My date was also a good friend of mine, although I won’t lie I wish he was more than that (more in that later :P). The dance itself was ridiculously fun even if it was pretty cliché, I mean come on we all love a little cliché sometimes!

So now many of you probably want to know about this guy…

He and I  met in like 7th grade. We were kind of friends for most of middle school. Freshman year we kind of lost touch but last year we had a class together and became really good friends. Around that same time I realized that despite, or maybe because, he was a pretty big nerd (in the best possible sense I believe that being a nerd is a great thing to be :P) I REALLY like him. He’s funny, and in a school where I feel 10x smarter than 90% of the people he challenged me to think. This year we again had a class together and only became better friends. We texted each other almost daily, talked daily, and hung out a few times. To me and all of my friends it seemed pretty clear that he felt the same way about me that I did about him.

So about a week after JDD I asked him how he felt about me. I didn’t confess my undying love for him or anything crazy just “I was wondering if you saw me as just a friend of maybe more…” To his credit he let me down quite easy. He told me that at the moment he was not looking for a relationship, he hoped he hadn’t led me on, and wanted to stay “close friends.” Was I disappointed? Yeah, as high school began I had quickly given up on finding a guy who could get me enough to be my boyfriend. But as we got closer I got my hopes up that maybe I would actually have a boyfriend. So despite him being really nice about it, it was still hard to hear.

I had hoped that we could go back to normal as much as possible after that. Obviously I expected it to be a little awkward at first, but I am pretty mature, and I thought he was as well so we could get past it right? Apparently not. 3 months later, despite plenty of effort on my part, we hardly talk and he seemed to only get more uncomfortable as time went on. :(

And now its summer, so who knows what will happen. I know that his life has not been easy lately and will only get harder this summer. He has problems with his jaw and just today got pretty intense surgery to fix it, the recovery from which will take all summer. But I should also note that he never told me this himself, his mom told my mom who told me. I am hoping that maybe when he has recovered from the surgery and it is not looming on his mind anymore maybe things will change with us, but I am also trying to move on :)

Phew! Lets move away from the personal soap opera now and onto today, which has been pretty uneventful.

I woke up at 7:30, that may not seem late but compared to getting up at 5:30 for school it was heaven. Breakfast was a homemade waffle with peanut butter, fig jam, and a banana with a pear, grapes, and cherries.

AFter breakfast I went to kickboxing ( I love being able to drive!!) and had a killer workout.

Lunch was barbecue tempeh and salad that I forgot to take pictures of because I was so hungry :P

So there’s my update for y’all! My weight is still going up and down, although more the former than the latter unfortunately. My thyroid medication seems to be working as far as my blood tests showed but I haven’t been having any better luck on the scale yet but I will keep you posted.

I hope everyone is enjoying the beginning of summer, especially if you are still in school!!

xoxo Elli

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